


No Way, No How, Nuh-Uh

by defeatedbyabridge



Category: Power Rangers S.P.D.
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-16
Updated: 2012-03-16
Packaged: 2017-11-02 00:59:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/363260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/defeatedbyabridge/pseuds/defeatedbyabridge
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack can be coaxed. He can be tempted. He can be pushed, prodded, and poked. But there are some things that Jack Landors Will Not Allow.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Way, No How, Nuh-Uh

Jack said, "Bfah?" Someone knocked at the door again. Jack looked around, still not quite sure where he was and why. He said, "Fuhpl. Gzzr. DOOR," then pushed himself to his feet and walked over, running a hand through his hair to straighten it a little. 

Why was someone waking him up in- yeah, okay, it was the middle of the day, but still, why was someone WAKING HIM UP?!

He opened the door.

It was Syd. 

Of course. 

She had bags and bags over both arms and she was grinning that grin that only Syd could grin at him. That grin that said she had something in mind for him and he might like it and he might not, but fighting it would be VERY difficult. She pushed past him with very little effort and turned around. "Well? Aren't you going to shut the door?" she demanded.

"I worked all last night," Jack said plaintively, doing exactly that. His gentle shove sent the door slamming back into its frame -- whoops -- and he leaned against it. "I'm very tired, Syd." 

"I know," she said, her voice softening a little. "But I got you presents?" She dropped the bags on the floor and began taking things out, one by one. "Look. Jeans that actually fit you."

Jack raised his eyebrows. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad, after all. 

"A shirt with a COLLAR. So we can be seen OUT TOGETHER."

He took the shirt and held it up against himself, nodding slowly. It was red, with white stripes down the front. Not bad, and the size looked perfect. Hang on. Why did the size look perfect? They hadn't been going out that long and hadn't actually slept together -- at least not yet. "Syd..." he began cautiously, not sure if he'd like the answer.

"...a leather jacket! You're gonna look so hot in this, Jack. Uh, yes?"

"How did you find out my size?"

He expected to hear something like, 'oh, I checked your jacket while you were out of the room' or something similarly simple. Something a little invasive but not too bad. 

What he GOT, was Syd's calm little voice saying, "I had Bridge and Sky scan you in the showers in the locker room."

Jack sat down suddenly on the floor as all the air went out of his legs. "You what?" he said. His voice was muffled. His face was buried in his hands.

"I had them scan you while you were all lathered up and singing 'Day-O'," she said calmly. "To get all the right measurements. I knew you'd never come out with me so I got them to scan you, then I went to my favourite stores. Christian and Melissa looked after me like they always do." 

"I'm gonna kill them," Jack said, raising his face. "They're both gonna die. Messily. Preferably naked. No, not naked, that'd freak me out too much."

"Christian and Melissa are very good at their jobs and don't deserve any grief from you!" Syd snapped. 

"Not them! Sky! Bridge! Bridge and Sky! Sky and Bridge! The two guys who looked at my soapy naked body!" 

"Only through a scanner," Syd said. She came over and knelt in front of him, placing a hand on his shoulder. She was pulling her usual big blue eyes, butter wouldn't melt, expression, and as usual it was WORKING. Jack sighed. "Come on, Jack. It's all perfectly all right. Nothing they haven't seen before. Though I never knew you sang."

"Only in the shower," Jack muttered. He got up and went through the rest of the clothes with Syd. 

...and he had to admit, she'd done a good job. "See?" she said at the end, looking at a magazine in the bottom of the last bag. "That wasn't so scary. Maybe you should THANK Bridge and Sky for leering at your soapy naked body."

Jack groaned. "You had to push it, didn't you."

"Yes, all right," Syd said, laughing. "But at least we got some good stuff. Now, about your hair...?"

She waved the middle of the magazine at him. 

The magazine featured a wide range of men's hairstyles. Two were circled. One had sideburns nearly as long as his arm, with a quiff on top that would do Elvis proud. The other had the top shaved and the sides were all done in little plaits. 

Jack stared, and covered his head with his hands automatically. There was some kind of noise behind him but he was too focused on rebuffing this piece of insanity to pay any attention. "No. No way. Not happening, Syd. I DON'T CARE HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU MAKE LOOK AT ME NAKED."

Syd's mouth was open. She pointed slowly over his shoulder. Jack spun only to see Z with her hands on her hips, leaning against the doorframe. "How many people are there?" she enquired sweetly. 

"Never mind," Jack muttered, dropping back onto the bed. Why wasn't this day over already?

"Let me tell you," Syd said. She kissed Jack on the forehead and twined her arm through Z's. "Get some rest, Jack." 

Z and Syd walked out together, arm in arm, murmuring away to each other. Z said over her shoulder, "Daylight come and me wanna go home?" 

And Jack knew he'd never sleep again.


End file.
